Sweet Hubby and I are approaching a transition point and have some big decisions to make about where our life will head next. This post is less about the actual decision we'll be making and more about how we process decisions as people and as couples. Since being married, I've found decision making to take on a whole new weighty quality. Its not that I've ever been very impulsive or irresponsible, I mean I am the girl whose favorite activity on an iphone is list-making. But in my former life, decisions were focused on MY goals, my desires and my needs. Often those were somewhat altruistic as well, but when it came down to it, I went and did what I wanted to do because I wanted to do it. Then....
|and it begins...|
But, y'know what? We did all those things. And Hubs has done a million and one things for me that I'm sure his unspoken response to initially included a lot of these: #*&@$. I come up with some crazy ideas people. Ahem, peaches.
|But I want this doggie!!!|
But what about the decisions where there is no compromise and communal consensus is required? Like where to live, whether to buy a house or start a family. Those decisions have to be made together.
For us, at this time in our lives, it's been about speaking up and voicing what we really want and why. It has also been about finding common ground where we can both achieve what our hearts really desire and sometimes that has included re-envisioning how we thought life should look.
I'd love to hear how you all do it... how you build consensus in a marriage composed of two different people. It is definitely fun learning.. and scary... and exciting. But it does make me feel like a grown up.
|Together forever and ever and ever and ever....|
PS: I wrote this post a few weeks ago and just now got around to adding pictures and posting. Some of you reading this might feel like you just entered a time warp.